My wife loves to read the obituaries.  No, she’s not looking for hot (or would it be ’cold’) leads on cars or apartments -although I have heard of such things.  And no, my wife is not 85 years old.  Lisa is a social worker by trade, with a special emphasis in geriatrics, and so she often finds herself strolling through the obits keeping her eye out for names of former clients that were under her care.

During a recent read, she stumbled across a very interesting name:  Merry Christmas Hofmeister.  Yes, that was her real first name: Merry Christmas.  She died earlier this month in the city of St. Louis.  So there you have it.  Merry Christmas has died.

There is more than a little irony in those words.  First, Merry Christmas died in December. Interesting.  Isn’t that a line in an Alanis Morissette song?

Second, Merry Christmas died in a era where many were already mourning the loss of being able to wish the check-out girl at Target those words without fear of being beaten about the face and shoulders with a menora - as we now live in the overly “P.C.” world of holiday trees and “Season’s Greetings.

Lastly, I write this post with Christmas some three days in the rearview mirror.  And I, along with many others I am sure, find myself, saddened over the fact that yet another Christmas season has come and gone with nothing but wrapping paper and leftover ham to look at.  Yes, Merry Christmas has died.

Of course, this is where my pastoral side urges me to remind everyone (myself included) that we live in the glow of Christmas every single day. Christ come into the world; bought it with his blood, and is connecting people to the Father as we speak.  Merry Christmas is actually alive and well.  Okay - obligatory pastoral insight concluded.  I had to say it, or else they will take my collar away.

But still, I wonder what drove someone to name their child “Merry Christmas” in the first place?  My guess is that it was driven by exactly what I mentioned a moment ago.  I’m sure they so loved this time of year: the joy, the hope, the wonder, the magic, and wanted some remnant of it to be carried throughout the year and reflected at all times in the life of their child.  If true, a wonderful aim.

With that said, (and with no disrespect meant toward the late Merry Christmas Hofmeister) I would like to offer up the following suggestions for first names:

1. Super Bowl Sunday Jones
2. Thanksgiving Thompson
3. Good Friday Jenkins
4. President’s Day Peterson
5. Easter Morning O’Malley

I vote for number 5.  Merry Christmas.